The following attitudes are so helpful for those undergoing counseling. Read and ponder these, and begin to work on them - it will assist you tremendously in your quest for wholeness and personal growth.
Humility is admitting I don’t have all the answers, I am not perfect, I make mistakes, and I can learn much from others.Humble people do well in counseling, where as counseling can be more of a struggle for proud people.
Emotional honesty involves facing my emotions, both negative and positive. Emotional honesty allows me to own and feel emotions without judgement, and then process them so I talk them out rather than act them out. Emotional honesty is something to apply to myself; it is not permission to say all those feelings I have bottled up. Emotions are a gateway to the heart. Most pain is actually heart pain, felt in the emotions. Facing these can be new and scary territory. Your counselor has much experience in helping you work emotions through, but being honest helps the process enormously.
This means to be able to be open and non-defensive to feedback that is useful for my growth.. A gentle heart that can receive truth and feedback from others will be the one that grows strong. Counseling gives you a place to grow and develop your own personality and ideas. Being teachable will assist your growth.
Most of us develop our lifelong coping mechanisms in our childhood and teens. Unless we consciously review these, and decide to adapt them to mechanisms appropriate for adult life, we may perpetuate unhealthy coping mechanisms until old age. Your counselor will help you face issues within the safety of the counseling room. Gaining skills, wisdom and insights there, you will be more equipped to grow in a healthy fashion. Facing and forgiving brings healthy growth.
Forgiveness is letting go completely of any chance of getting back at someone who wronged you. It may even mean starting to hope for their good rather than their destruction. Again in your own timing and not until you are ready, your counselor will be available to walk with you on this part of the journey to wholeness. People who do not forgive find their lives become bitter, while the offender may have no idea he/she wronged you, and lives a happy life. Don’t waste your life in bitterness!
Examine your motives, not just your behaviors. Ask yourself not just what are you doing, but why? What drives you? As you explore who you are, why you live as you do, and how you best can grow in relating to others, honestly facing your motives will help your growth significantly.
A desire for reconciliation and restoration of relationships is crucial to this attitude. These prior attitudes become the foundation of this peaceful interaction with others. Again your counselor will assist you in this process as and when you are ready.
The process of embarking on a journey to healing and wholeness takes determination and courage. It takes strong character to make these choices. The initial steps maybe painful, but be assured this is normal, it is simply previously suppressed emotions beginning to surface. The lifelong prize is healing, wholeness, and maturity.
If reading this has raised issues you would like to discuss in confidence with one of our professional counselors, please make a booking through our friendly receptionists.